Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I actually pay taxes

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I like this guy and his personality is AMAZING. He’s everything I want EXCEPT I’m not 100% attracted to him. I’ve dated some really hot guys and I’m wondering if that’s ruined dating for me? What do I do?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

How were cows used in ancient India?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

What measures do celebrities take to protect their images from being used for commercial purposes without permission? How much does this typically cost them?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I can read

Why do atheists love to preach against Abrahamic religions and mock God? Even if they do not fear the eternal fire of hell, pious Muslims will certainly not leave them alone and will take brutal revenge until they surrender and repent of their sins.

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Why is it so common for married white women to have an affair with black men? Does it bother white guys?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Is Tinder the best dating app?

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

If Jesus was crucified by Governor Pontius Pilate, why does the Quran deny his death?

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Liquid Glass is more than skin deep on macOS Tahoe - AppleInsider

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Do dogs feel love?

I see through liars

I can count

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What, when building a house, are the necessary wires (beside 120v) to future proof my house, Cat6, Coax, low voltage, and alarm wires?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand how hurricane paths work

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t buy bullshit

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones